Stand up and speak out fearlessly

Did you know that public speaking is one of the most frequent and strongest fears that people have? I used to be one of them and here is what I learned. My fears stemmed from memories of numerous failed and embarrassing class speeches that had gone horribly wrong. Additionally, I grew up believing that what I had to say was not interesting anyway. Plus, I hated confrontation and public speaking was the worst case scenario. Can you relate to any of this?

Consequently, for many years I would do everything I could to avoid public speaking in any form and this meant even avoiding speaking up for myself. For a long time, I denied my inner voice that was inviting me to challenge these beliefs and to stand up and speak out fearlessly!

Don’t get me wrong. I did find many creative and ‘safe’ ways of expressing myself. Unwittingly, they have helped me to build my confidence, hone my expertise and most importantly stand in my authority and explore what I am really good at and enjoy. The advent of social media, podcasts, tele-summits, blogging and self-publishing have all contributed greatly to my ‘coaching’.

A key to effective problem solving I have found – and one that addresses all aspects of an issue – is to never face a problem head on! This can create huge resistance and amplifies feelings of frustration and overwhelm and discouragement. For example, if you are driving from A to Z and on the way there is a major road block, you would look for alternative routes and ways to get there, right? Looking for alternatives and solutions is a great way to solve problems and allows other possibilities to show up, which you may not of thought of initially. So what this advent did for me, was that I was actually learning to stand up and speak out, without seeing it as public speaking! This helped removed the fear factor and look at things from a different perspective.

It’s taken many years to finally break through this pattern of fear and shift my mindset around public speaking. Funnily enough, I realized this fully when I recently gave a talk at my local library’s ‘Author’s Evening’ to introduce my book FEARLESSLY ALONE‘ and talk about what had motivated me and why. Was I nervous? You bet! In fact, unusually so. Because this time I was presenting something that was important to me – it wasn’t like those classroom speeches where I spoke about someone else’s ideas – this was about issues that were close to my heart and I felt extremely vulnerable. Yet, I wanted to be able to stand up and speak out fearlessly, even if others were challenging me and didn’t agree. I wanted to present my ideas without being confrontational and yet inspire food for thought and challenge old concepts. And I did just that!

You see, I knew my material well. It was a part of me and my life experience. I was my resource library. To create the mindset I wanted, I looked at all the beliefs that surfaced and I shifted each and every one of them. I also created those I would need as a positive back up – confidence, self-worth, awareness, humour and being willing to be vulnerable. I was able to transmute the fear of judgement of others and the need to be wrong or right. I was there to express my interesting point of view, to offer food for thought and to create connection with those whom my information could support.

More importantly, all the previous online ‘training’ had been preparing me for this moment and as I took action, even feeling really nervous, I was able to connect to that place within where I know who I am and believe in myself. It was such a wonderful and empowering experience! So much so, that it has ignited a burning desire to stand up and speak out fearlessly more often. Who would have thought this was possible? Certainly not that shy and unhappy school girl from way back. It took me six years to manifest this evening and prepare myself mentally and emotionally and spiritually. It all began a long time ago, when my Heart’s Knowing whispered to me, “You can do it!”… and so can you!

Some steps you can take towards standing up and speaking out fearlessly are:

  • Dare to believe in your dreams, no matter how silly or far away they may seem.
  • Ask and be willing to receive.
  • Take the baby steps and actions that come with ease to you.
  • Change direction as required without losing sight of your destination.
  • Build a mindset with beliefs that support your growth and that feel good along the way.
  • Trust that any thing is possible and look for opportunities!
  • Believe in yourself!

In Light and Appreciation

Trilby


Trilby Johnson is an Emotional Breakthrough Mentor, Author and Speaker whose clients hire her to go from emotional zero to emotional hero, as they heal, alleviate stress and cultivate emotional freedom in their lives, relationships, finances, emotions, health and mindset. She shares her knowledge of how to create inner harmony and outer balance with those seeking to deepen their self-knowing and expand their consciousness.

Contact Trilby for a Breakthrough Alchemy Assessment if you are ready for go from zero to hero now!

©Trilby Johnson. All Rights Reserved. Copyright Prohibited. Please share any part of this article with reference to this original blog.

Disclaimer: Any information shared here is not a substitute or replacement of any medical, psychological, legal or financial advice.

 

10 Tips to a Happier Healthier You

10 Tips to a Happier Healthier You

When it comes to health and happiness, the key is balance and allowing. In the West, health focus is mostly on the physical body and even emotional issues are treated clinically. In contrast, Eastern philosophies on health focus includes aspects of the body, mind, soul – the belief is that all aspects function in an interactive and complimentary fashion. To encompass both approaches, here are 10 tips that have helped me to establish a happy and healthy approach to life and that continue to expand into more.

  1. Make yourself #1 in your life
    You must put yourself first. Why? Because you are the only one who can create the right balance of happy and healthy for you. If you are putting other people before you, then you are giving off a signal that you are not important and that it’s okay with you to be bypassed. If you want to change this, then you have to claim your own priority to you. When done in a harmonious way, this already will bring more balance to your life. And if you are a parent, this is an important message that you will be teaching your children. It’s a major step in loving yourself, to being able to show compassion and kindness to others. Don’t worry that you are being selfish as long as you are honest and sincere with yourself this is what is important. Arrogance and self-obsession stems from a lack of confidence, not from self-esteem.
  2. Start where you are
    I have found when it comes to changing a pattern successfully and sustainably, it’s best to start where you are and make bite-sized adjustments. This helps you to stay present and dispel any feelings of overwhelm and move forward steadily and keep focused on your desired target. As John Heywood said, ‘Rome was not built in a day.’. Give yourself permission if required, to take things slowly. Taking action is what is important.
  3. Set your target
    What does happy and healthy look like for you? It’s really important to connect to the ‘essence’ of what these words mean to you. Not what someone else has told you. A great way to do this is to ask yourself, ‘what would my life look like when I am happy and healthy?’. Write these down, especially the way you will feel about yourself and your life.
    The great thing about setting a target and writing down your desired outcome, i.e. how you want to feel, is that this already prepares your brain for new input and finding corresponding stimuli. It’s also useful as a form of accountability, so you can see how you are progressing. Sometimes you have to look backwards to see just how far you have come.
  4. Tailor your beliefs to suit you
    The beliefs you have are important, as they are the building blocks by which you function. I often work with clients who have passed through the medical or traditional systems and are still looking for solutions. They did not buy into the beliefs of others. They are choosing to do whatever it takes and find a way of being healthy that works for them.
    Even people with similar beliefs experience life differently. You experience life the way you do for the simple reason that you are unique and you. Only you are experiencing life in the specific way that you are doing it. Cultivate beliefs around being healthy and happy for you.
  5. Eat when you are truly hungry
    Most things in our society today run to schedule. Whilst this may contribute to a smooth functioning, the human body has its own rhythm. Failure to heed this natural rhythm can lead to ill-health or feelings of dissatisfaction over time.
    The next time you feel hungry, try this first.  Check in with my body and ask it, ‘are you hungry?’. Did you know that people often confuse thirst with hunger? Your body often requires water before it requires food, yet because we eat so routinely we can override our biology. I always ask the one who knows – my body.
  6. Honour your emotions
    Whatever emotions you are feeling, you are feeling them for a reason. Take the time to contemplate them and look for safe ways to express and manage them. I have found working with clients, that the biggest cause of disease comes from suppressed and repressed emotions. Hire a facilitator to support you in managing your emotions in a healthy and happy way. Your body will thank you for it.
  7. Do things that makes your body feel good
    Now if you are in a place of ill-health or feel depressed, this can seem a huge task. There are so many instructions from everywhere about everything, that it’s easy to get confused and feel overwhelmed. Your body generally knows what it requires better than you do, although this is not what we have been taught. In fact, we have been taught to mistrust our bodies, which results in us always being caught on the wrong foot. Your body knows how it wants to move to feel good and how often, just as it knows when it needs to take a nap. Follow that!
  8. Find happy and healthy people who inspire you
    Notice I say ‘that inspire you’. This means people who have qualities that you would like to upload into your behaviour data bank. Remember making yourself #1? It’s important to have these kind of role models in your life so that you are constantly stimulated and growing in ways that feel good to you. This will make it easier to stay energized and discerning when dealing with other people and situations that may be difficult.
  9. Ask for help
    If you are struggling to achieve and experience your ideal of health or happiness, ask for help. Ask your higher guidance, that the right people show up in your life who have the information you require to take the next step for you. Then, trust and allow it to come to you and be ready to receive. Easy to say, perhaps not so easy to do – this is when having a coach or mentor comes in handy. I had to experience burn-out before I learned the lesson to ask for help and hand things over to the Universe at the end of each day. Don’t confuse independence with having to do everything yourself or on your own.
  10. Be Grateful
    It’s not always easy to feel grateful, especially if you are down and having a hard time when it comes to lack of health or prosperity. Happiness can seem a long way off. I can remember times when writing my daily gratitude list when all I could manage was ‘I am grateful that I have the desire to be grateful even though it may be difficult in this moment’. There is great wisdom in counting your blessings. Every day there are so many things that are simply taken for granted which are in reality the stuff of magic. Look for the magic and it will appear.

The above list of tips to be a happy healthy you, is of course far from complete. Notice too that I have not mentioned food specifically, because I believe that if you follow these tips, what you eat will adjust itself automatically. These tips have been effective for me in my own personal growth. I have found by applying and following them, the possibility of more health and happiness appears in a myriad of ways and place without effort.

Here’s to your abundant happiness and health!

In Light and Appreciation
Trilby x


Trilby Johnson is an Emotional Breakthrough Mentor, Author and Speaker whose clients hire her to go from emotional zero to emotional hero, as they heal, alleviate stress and cultivate emotional freedom in their lives, relationships, finances, emotions, health and mindset. She shares her knowledge of how to create inner harmony and outer balance with those seeking to deepen their self-knowing and expand their consciousness.

Contact Trilby for a Breakthrough Alchemy Assessment if you are ready for go from zero to hero now!

©Trilby Johnson. All Rights Reserved. Copyright Prohibited. Please share any part of this article with reference to this original blog.

Disclaimer: Any information shared here is not a substitute or replacement of any medical, psychological, legal or financial advice.

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The H Factors That Add Value To Your Life

The H Factors That Add Value To Your Life

the-h-factors-blog

You’ve probably heard about the X Factor but have you heard about the H Factors? This is not about the TV show and more about setting your own default value settings so that you will be the star in your own life.  When it comes to living a successful life, I believe there are two H factors that you must add to your value system to have this – Happiness and Health!

The motivation behind much of what humans do, is to have these two things in life. All the running after success, love and money is basically linked to these two aspects of life. Ask people what they want most in life and ultimately when you drill right down, it’s about being happy and healthy. Yet for many, these two simple factors are rare or sporadic. Many spend their lives working hard to earn money and make ends meet, only to lose along the way, the very things they have been aiming for in the first place and long-term – their happiness and health. Suddenly, the future can look and feel really bleak.

My new book ‘Fearlessly Alone – Stop the Lonely Crisis and Find Your Happy’ takes an insightful and informative look at how happiness and health are imperative to living a fulfilled life and how to achieve them. It is important to add and prioritize these values in your life, to give yourself a fighting chance at peace, prosperity and a purposeful relationship with yourself and consequently others too.

Your values are a set of core principles that you use in making decision across your life based on importance and need. Not to be confused with your beliefs, which are basically assumptions that we take to be true.  A conflict of values can arise when two important values come into play and you have to make an important life decision.  For instance, whether to stay in a job you hate and find boring for security because you’ve been there for years, or to go for a new job where you can express your value of creativity and independence but there is less job and financial security.

Throughout your life, you strive to meet your values – like respect, love, faith, happiness, health, family, abundance, time, money, etc  – and that are the backbone to so many of your choices. It’s important to ask questions when it comes to the ranking of your values, especially when having a conflict of values. Because there is a reason behind this and it may not always be what you think it is.

Prioritizing and updating your values is very important because you and the situations you find yourself in change. When I did this exercise a few years ago, imagine my astonishment when I saw that happiness and health were not even in the top 10. No wonder there seemed to be a lack around happiness and health. Actively participating in your values settings, helps to prioritize them in your subconscious mind and is boosted further when you set positive intentions. It’s about adding value to your life, when and how it serves you best.

Here is a short exercise to help you identify and update your top 10 core values are:

  1. Sit down and write down the first things that come to mind that are important to you in your life. (If you need examples of values, just google values and you can find lists to draw from.)
  2. Rank them from 1 to 10 with 1 being the most important and 10 the least.
  3. Then ask yourself if these are still valid for you?
  4. Are these values truly your own?
  5. When sorted, ask if there are any ‘new’ values that you wish to add? Add and rank them.
  6. Reflect on what has come up for you and also write down any of the beliefs that may have popped up. For example, your health depends on your genetic make-up; you can’t be happy because then people will think you are selfish.
  7. If happiness and health are not in your top 10, I invite you to add them in. Just for fun and because you can. Then sit back and watch what shows up.

When it comes to your personal values about happiness and health, the way you feel can offer up wonderful and powerful clues. Tune in to your body and sense where the feelings are physical sensations and what they feel like. For instance, do you feel heavy or light. Your body is the best barometer you will ever have when it comes to making the best life choices for you. Simply because, if something doesn’t feel right, it probably isn’t the best choice – for you, in the moment. Check in regularly as you are constantly changing with each choice you make. What makes you happy or feel healthy today, may not be the same in two weeks time.

The more you clarify your values and the beliefs you hold around happiness and health, the more confident you can be when making important life decisions. Your happiness and health and how you create and sustain them are so important to feeling confident and fulfilled in your life. Incorporating these H Factors into your decisions will put the You into Value! That’s what happened for me, once I did. And the same is possible for you too.

In Light and Appreciation
Trilby

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Trilby Johnson is an Emotional Breakthrough Mentor, Author and Speaker whose clients hire her to go from emotional zero to emotional hero, as they heal, alleviate stress and cultivate emotional freedom in their lives, relationships, finances, emotions, health and mindset. She shares her knowledge of how to create inner harmony and outer balance with those seeking to deepen their self-knowing and expand their consciousness.

Contact Trilby for a Breakthrough Alchemy Assessment if you are ready for go from zero to hero now!

©Trilby Johnson. All Rights Reserved. Copyright Prohibited. Please share any part of this article with reference to this original blog.

Disclaimer: Any information shared here is not a substitute or replacement of any medical, psychological, legal or financial advice.Save

Ouch, That Hurt!

Ouch, That Hurt!

Ouch Blog Post HeaderHave you ever noticed how you are just cruising along and ticking off those things on your to-do-list – whether for your business or your personal affairs – and you are feeling really good and in cruise mode – when suddenly, it’s like a trap door opens up beneath your feet and you fall into the black abyss? Yet again! Almost as if you had made no progress at all. I know, right! It can be extremely frustrating and disheartening to say the least, even when you can say it happens less often. This is what happened to me recently. Let me explain!

There I was, toodling along in creative mode, feeling really excited and filled with a  wonderful sense of accomplishment. I had completed writing for two new projects – my new book ‘Fearlessly Alone’ and a collaborative project. Phew! (Which is the reason I hadn’t written any blogs in a while and I had wanted to stay totally focused on getting these done.) Now, I found myself suddenly with heaps of more time on my hands, as you do when you complete a big project and are working to a deadline. There was a lot of empty space – to enjoy and for new stuff to come in. And it did! Some really great and easy new stuff and some not so new stuff, obviously still hidden in the dark recesses of my subconscious and that needed to be looked at in a new way. And yes, ouch that hurt!

What really intrigues me when it comes to Awareness, is that being ‘aware’ enables me to access pools of information all of the time. This is a relief to the perfectionist in me, because it means I don’t have to learn everything – all I have do is tune in to my Awareness and allow that specific information to show up. Of course this attitude means I have to give up the need to control every single little aspect of everything. All of which is fueled by a fear of failure. Now, I am not going to lie and say that this always runs smoothly. Cause just like those little emoticons that pop up on your screen, when strong emotions are at play, it can make for a rocky day. So it helps me to have a strategy for firstly coping and then resolving. Sounds good, doesn’t it! And so how can this hurt, you may be wondering?

A while ago, I signed-up for breakthrough session with a coach whose work I have participated in and whose expertise I respect and admire. So I was looking forward to the 30 minutes conversation and hoping for some more clarity around a specific issue. You know, one of those areas in my life where I still felt like I ‘had to work on myself’. It was not five minutes into the call and conversation, when my mood took a sharp nose-dive and it felt like I was floundering. By the end of the call, I hung up feeling  really down in the dumps and filled with doubt. What had happened?! Where had my sense of inner calm and accomplishment vanished to? Allow me to share.

Just like many people, I have my ‘down’ moments and experience feelings of doubt, fear, anger at times – it is part of the human experience. Thank goodness though, that I have the strategy that I mentioned earlier above, because here Life had presented me with an opportunity to apply it – take it for another test run. In other words, a curve ball. I was faced with an opportunity to grow. I knew there was something positive and insightful to take away from this situation and that would reveal to me, my inner workings and how they were derailing me and looking for fine-tuning. Whereas previously, these kinds of moments would last for days, if not weeks or months and become situations, nowadays I am happy to say that whilst they hurt in the moment, they no longer lasted very long anymore. The highs and the lows are becoming more harmonious!

Now, if you don’t yet know me or my story, then I want to share that ‘walking my talk’ is an essential and practical part of how I choose to experience Being Me. It is also an important part of the ‘know how’ that I teach, about how to move away from overwhelm and stress and move into a place of being able to make choices calmly and confidently in daily life. Fortunately, I had recorded the conversation, so I could go back and listen.  I was curious as to what had triggered this downward emotional spike and so I listened to the replay. And I got real clear on the reason that it felt Ouch, That Hurt!

What was evident to me when listening back over the conversation, was how, after the first few minutes, the way I spoke about myself and my situation came from a place of victim mentality and focus. It was a real eye opener for me, to listen to the way in which I spoke about my situation during this call and what I had focused on. Furthermore, I had doubted myself and where I was at on my timeline. I had allowed myself to become distracted! No wonder my feelings had plummeted! And thank goodness they had. My inner alert system is working well. I had to listen to the replay for a third time – this time with conscious detachment – before I felt my inner calm and energy once again. It no longer hurt!

What did I take away from this experience?

  • This served as such a wonderful wake-up call for me and the realizations that there are still parts within myself that may feel afraid and full of doubts.
  • By choosing to love these parts of myself and to thank them for showing me that my journey of knowing myself unfolds more each day in remarkable ways, I was able to raise my vibration again to a place of feeling good.
  • This incident proved to be a powerful reminder to honour and follow my own Inner Authority, no matter what or who I was talking to.
  • Respecting and admiring another person does not mean disregarding what I know does or does not work for me.
  • I am the one who picks up the tab and so I figure that allows me to choose and enjoy the contrast of experiences that springs up and seems appropriate for me.
  • In the moment I was able to be grateful for and release the Ouch, that hurt and turn it into a Yay, I am on my way!
  • Every situation is an opportunity to take stock of where I am on my vibrational scale of inner balance, because what is within is reflected without.

I am so grateful for this experience that brought me greater understanding of myself!

Can you identify an area or situation  in your life where you felt down or heavy and then something wonderful emerged later on? Where you turned your Ouch that hurt, into a Yay! ? Choose to believe that not only does Life have your back – you do as well! Re-member that you are the vital part of your Equation.

In Light and Appreciation
Trilby


Trilby Johnson is an Emotional Breakthrough Mentor, Author and Speaker whose clients hire her to go from emotional zero to emotional hero, as they heal, alleviate stress and cultivate emotional freedom in their lives, relationships, finances, emotions, health and mindset. She shares her knowledge of how to create inner harmony and outer balance with those seeking to deepen their self-knowing and expand their consciousness.

Contact Trilby for a Breakthrough Alchemy Assessment if you are ready for go from zero to hero now!

©Trilby Johnson. All Rights Reserved. Copyright Prohibited. Please share any part of this article with reference to this original blog.

Disclaimer: Any information shared here is not a substitute or replacement of any medical, psychological, legal or financial advice.

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Your Home Is Your Body

Your Home Is Your Body

Your Home Is Your BodyWhere do you live and under what conditions? Since the age of 17 I have moved 25 times. I haven’t counted the times I moved prior to 17, but it was a lot. I don’t mind and I guess in some way this nurtured my love for travel. I have also had four major country moves in my life and I look forward to more. One thing I have learned from all this moving around though is that wherever I go, I take myself with me. Despite being in new surroundings after some time, the same old patterns would begin to emerge. Have you had this happen to you?

I am sharing this, because most people think of their home as the physical address where they live. There is a place that you live first and foremost though. Your body! Your first and permanent home, whilst you are alive, is your body. Whilst people take tremendous care of their physical houses and places of residence, most have very little knowledge of their true home – their body. This is the reason that so many give away their power to health professionals who supposedly know more about their home than they do. And this is partially true because we have been led away from our true homes. Everything is within and your access route is via your body.

So as your body is the place that you really live in and with for your whole life, what kind of a home do you want to experience and have? The conditions that you live in and under – with regards to your body – are extremely important as they will impact directly on the quality of your life’s experience. What if you had a home that is comfortable, that suits you, that supports you, where you can relax, where there is no judgement, where you can truly be you 24/7, where you can connect to health, abundance, love, joy and to your Self, etc.!

Through my 25 years as a Body Healer I have seen how disconnected so many are from their bodies. As long as you are disconnected and not fully present in and with your body, you will not experience being home. Most people are not even aware that they are in a space of disconnect because our brains have be wired to overlook this information, particularly in this very mental focused world. The mental will always keep you in the mental. Whereas your body will bring you information from your body-mind-soul. This is the reason that becoming aware of whether, where and how we are connected is, I feel, imperative to us finally experiencing the lives we say we desire. This is the Vision I hold because it has been my life’s experience.

For many years I looked outside of myself for a sense of being home and it was only when I started to love and honour my body exactly as it was that my sense of confidence, love and joy expanded. It was then that I began to get an inkling of the immense wisdom that was hidden and that came through my physical sensations, hunches and feelings. Our bodies capture the language of the Universe – Energy – and are constantly communicating it to us. Up until now, many of us however have ignored these signals because we have been given misguided information, if any at all. To truly experience living orgasmically – that sense of total and unlimited and beyond time sensual connection to all that is – we have to overcome first the fear – yes fear – of our bodies and then we have to learn to open up to the language of our body-mind-soul connection, which is all channeled via our physical body and aura.

Before we can love our body, we have to establish a connection and if there is a connection already, be willing to explore it further. True intimacy begins within each of us and it is only through a sense of self-trust that a reliable and confident connection comes about. As well as through trial and error. So don’t beat yourself up over it. When you learned to walk, you did it one step at a time. Also a healthy connection will flourish and become better integrated in a kind and loving environment. And it starts with you choosing these vibrations and then allowing whatever that is not or is to show up and be experienced so that it can be set free. Energy simply wants to move and it is our personalities that lock energy into our bodies through our choices of thoughts, feelings and emotions. I feel that we are now at a time in our evolution where shifting through and out of this is possible. The place to start, is at home. That means you and your body – the connection to your reality.

In Light and Appreciation
Trilby

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Trilby Johnson is a Transformational Author and Intuitive Energy Alchemist, who mentors individuals to love their body and explore it’s hidden wisdom so that their life can change and they make informed new life choices. If you are looking for support on this journey, please contact Trilby at http://www.trilbyjohnsontheconnective.com – many of her clients have experienced miraculous healing and a deep feeling of connection and balance. So can you.

Trilby’s book ‘A-Ha Moments – Inspirational Quotes to Shift Your Thinking‘ is an authentic treatise to live life on your own terms.

©Trilby Johnson 2016. If you do share any part of this article, please quote the author and reference the original blog here
http://trilbyjohnsontheconnective.com/blogconnectiveharmony/
Thank you.