7 Healthier Ways To Manage Anger

7 Healthier Ways To Manage Anger

You may call me a dreamer… am I the only one?

I generally don’t feel comfortable making guarantees when it comes to cures. I am 100% confident, however, that anything is possible when you are open to alternatives and focused on solutions. And in this case, I have a personal track record of success and a sound knowledge base to draw upon.

Meditation is one of the most accessible and straightforward tools that I know of that does both; offering a well-being alternative and providing a solution, while still being complementary to the majority of treatments and modalities. It does take practise and an open mind to perfect however… and that’s when the fun and improvement can really begin!

According to the medical definition of meditation on thefreedictionary.com“Meditation is a practice of concentrated focus upon a sound, object, visualization, the breath, movement, or attention itself in order to increase awareness of the present moment, reduce stress, promote relaxation, and enhance personal and spiritual growth.”

So, that’s already quite a lot of benefits, don’t you think?

Even today, many of Western culture perceive meditation as doing nothing, wasting time that they believe they don’t have, something that is too woo-woo for them to do, or it’s some kind of a cult. And while it may have its roots in more spiritual doctrines and more modernly within the concept of mindfulness, meditation is very much a practical non-secular tool, that can and does support a sense of an easier and more fulfilled life in the real and busy world of today. It’s definitely, in my opinion, worth finding the time for.

Half an hour’s meditation each day is essential, except when you are busy. Then a full hour is needed.”  – Saint Francis de Sales

I feel meditation is a type of ‘Feng-Shui’ for the body, mind, and soul.

It helps to create a peaceful, calm and beneficial balance that creates a harmonious environment on the inside and outside. Many people only think of their health from a physical aspect. However, research now shows the link between body and mind. Consequently, it’s important to find a healthy ‘all-in-one’ body-mind-soul balance. Like meditation for instance!

The wonder of meditation, in my experience, is that it hones your focus inwards, and shuts out the distractions and business of outside world, often affording the body to still and experience a deep state of relaxation and awareness.

It’s an opportunity to experience and understand what the ‘no-thing’ is, and gives the brain a “timeout” actually allowing it to organise and integrate all of those daily thoughts.

It can also result in major improvements in people’s health, moods, vitality, and ability to heal. Not bad for ‘no-thing’ happening right? Quite the contrary, in fact!

Medical research recognises stress as a major contributor, in some way or another, to most major modern diseases and mental health issues. Consequently, when you learn to contain, reduce and even eliminate the negative impact of stress in your life, this enables you to live healthier and calmer, physically and mentally.

In addition to the benefits already mentioned, regular meditation as a stand-alone practise offers extensive ways to improve and cultivate healing of the body, mind and soul in the following ways:

  • improved memory and concentration.

  • better and more positive moods.

  • optimal immune system function.

  • reduced blood pressure.

  • better sleep and quality of sleep.

  • increased creativity.

  • soothes mental and emotional processes.

  • affords the time for deeper subliminal integration of physical and mental processes.

  • ability to visualise.

  • less stress and more physical and emotional calmness.

  • physical improvement of symptoms of fibromyalgia and psoriasis, HIV, etc.

  • less reactive both mentally and emotionally.

  • deepens your connection to yourself and intuition.

  • relaxes, rejuvenates, and tones body and mind.

  • enables easier access to deeper personal wisdom.

  • activates an expansion of consciousnessand much more.

The paradox about meditation is that the experience itself is a state that lies beyond the linear mind. So, when it comes to healing or improving mental health, it’s important to not enter into meditation pushing towards getting over the issue at hand. Instead, enter a space of mindfulness and observing what is already there, without trying to change it… and then allow other possibilities to manifest.

Using the technique of visualisation, in this case, can be beneficial, as you are meditating with the awareness, images, and sensations of being healthy. This practice floods the subconscious with positive vibes of good health and well-being. The brain also has the time to only focus on one thing at a time and assesses everything as if it is happens. The ability to experience strong positive health and well-being, objectively, in a meditative state, is extremely powerful and the body and mind responds positively and organically.

A word of caution, however, when it comes to curing disease and the notion of healing. As humans, we have a physical body and usually focus on this more than the more invisible aspects of the psyche, emotions, and the soul. The ego-mind will have an image of what the resulting ‘cure’ looks like. However, on a soul-level, the solution that is ‘the cure’, can be quite a different kettle of fish, and also beyond any limits set by physical parameters. And sometimes, in the grand scheme of things, a cure does come in the form of death, when the body and soul are released from the dis-ease and physical, mental, and emotional pain.

Meditation is very effective in helping the ill to transition gracefully with the mental strength to accept their fate, making the transition more peaceful for all parties concerned, proving to be a calming force also when dealing with grief.

Meditation, in my experience, is about cultivating what I call the art of conscious detachment. It does so in a way that allows you to cure yourself of the burden of judgement and polarity thinking – regardless if something is right/wrong, good/bad, healthy/unhealthy etc. – living the experience fully and richly, whatever it may be. It’s what can make all the difference when it comes to living a great life, simply because it’s the one we have been given and we have the wisdom to know the difference.

You may call me a dreamer, and I’m not the only one! Meditation has helped me improve and fortify my mental health around issues of imperfection, impatience, and not feeling enough, time and time again, helping me become stronger, calmer, healthier and happier.

It has shown me that in the ‘no-thing’ there is ‘wholeness.’ That there is always a solution and cure – more often than not, it comes down to gaining access. In more ways than even acknowledged today by mainstream media, meditation can offer access to a world of infinite possibilities and well-being.

Don’t be led astray by misleading information and give it a go for yourself. As long-term meditation teaches, practise is perfection. And from where I stand, as far as cures go, that’s priceless and a valuable return on investment in your health and well-being. If it wasn’t for a long practice of meditation in my life, I would probably not have overcome my own mental health issues and be here to write about this amazing and natural ability.

Could meditation be a cure to mental health? Even if you don’t like the word – call it whatever you want, but give it a go for a while. Then you decide!

Here’s to your health and healing.

p.s. If you’re looking for a meditation audio to support your mental health, why not try this one I did -> Harmonize Your Chakras


Trilby Johnson, is a Breakthrough Healer and Mentor, Best-Selling Author and Motivational Speaker who empowers her clients to alleviate anxiety, relieve physio-emotional pain and reduce stress levels in their lives, relationships, finances, health, mindset and soul energetics.

To explore your options, book in with Trilby for a Breakthrough Assessment

©Trilby Johnson. All Rights Reserved. Copyright Prohibited. Please share any part of this article with reference to this original blog. Disclaimer: Any information shared here is not a substitute or replacement of any medical, psychological, legal or financial advice. 

5 Ways To Free Yourself From Emotional Rollercoasters

Emotions are very much a part of our daily lives and are deemed to be what distinguishes us from other ‘animals.’

Yet they can also be what trips us up again and again, as long as we are slaves to them, rather than their master.

For much of my life, I was on a series of distressful emotional roller-coasters that eventually resulted in mental and emotional health issues. Long-term these impacted on my relationships, jobs, finances, health and mindset.

Until one day, over feeling miserable and broken, I said, ‘No More.’

To change, I sought out information and professionals to help me acquire the skills I needed and that I hadn’t received while growing up. I was thirsty for knowledge and wanted to learn how to be happy without feeling like life was an emotional roller-coaster that was out of control.

Here are 5 Ways to be Free of Emotional Roller-Coasters that I Found to Work:

1. Keep Off the Ride:

This may seem obvious and yet it’s often overlooked. It’s important to know what pushes your buttons and to then manage situations and people you allow into your life.  How often do you get that little niggle inside and you ignore it? This is where the roller coaster ride begins – when we don’t heed that inner knowing of what is and isn’t good for us. This often occurs as we are afraid of being judged, failing, not fitting in or being wrong.

It’s important to notice and acknowledge all emotions, whether they are considered good or bad. They are messengers of the programmes playing out in our heads and which we are often indoctrinated into as we grow up, through parents, society, culture, and religion.

Get to know and manage your own personal emotional states, which will mean that you can make more informed decisions and be able to manage yourself with more confidence.

 

2. Meditate on A Regular Basis:

Meditation is a great preventative measure when done on a regular basis, as it helps the brain to actually have the time to organize information with you aware. Practised regularly, this helps diffuse and process volatile emotional energies before they get out of control.

Contrary to what many may believe or have been instructed, I found attempting to meditate when you are in the throes of strong emotions is futile. It’s like blowing on a fire that is already out of control in an attempt to put it out. Don’t try to meditate when you are on an emotional roller-coaster as this can feel like things are actually getting worse!

Wait until you are feeling calmer before you sit down to meditation.

Meditation helps to install a practise of being able to respond more calmly and mindfully to daily events.

 

3. Count to 10:

Ever heard Grandma say this? Well, she was definitely wise and onto something. It’s always wise to avoid taking action or making decisions when on an emotional roller-coaster. We have all experienced the damage one can do when under strong emotion and the regret that follows.

Emotions, especially strong ones, can swamp the brain, as it becomes flooded with physical reactions and then the brain is challenged on which reaction to prioritise. When stopping to count to 10, this gives the body a short lapse of time that opens a window in the brain, to move from flight and fight to more logical processing.

 

4. Stop and Breathe:

This simple yet powerful tool continues to be underused. When I say ‘take a breath’ to clients they laugh or make some cryptic comment – at least at first. And yet, stopping to take a breath changes everything.

Firstly, the act of stopping stops you. Use the previous point of counting to 10 to help you stop. Do this physically – pull over in the car, leave the room, stand up if sitting or sit down if standing. Change your physical stance.

Next, focus on taking a big conscious breath. Take several until you feel something shift. If the emotions begin to bubble up again, acknowledge them and make a conscious decision to deal with them at a later time once you are calmer and can think straight.

The mind is a great selection tool when calm and clear and not clouded by strong emotions. A clear head allows you to make a more informed choice and choose how to behave appropriately. Stopping and breathing will give you the time to choose.

The more often you practise stopping to take a conscious breath, the more you will unlock your secret weapon to stress release. I invite you to access my free audio DESTRESS DETOX RELAX now.

 

5. Learn Empowering Life Skills:

Hire a mentor or coach to learn the life skills you are missing. Most of us have not be taught how to manage our emotions in healthy ways and so we keep on repeating the same behavioural patterns. Until we replace the pattern with something new and different. If you struggle with emotional overwhelm often, there is no shame in seeking out support.

You’ve probably heard the saying, “Rome wasn’t built in a day,” well, neither was your emotional make-up.

Here are A Few Examples on How to Slowly Increase New Life Skills:

  • Read a wide range of articles on emotional intelligence and techniques.
  • Keep a journal of your own emotions and write about them – putting things down on paper is very empowering and it also keeps you accountable.
  • Make friends with your emotions – it’s easier to install change in a friendly environment.
  • Talk to other people and listen to their stories – it helps give a bigger picture.

 

As humans, we love to have meaning in our life… to feel the thrill… which can sometimes be found while on roller-coasters.

It’s not everyone’s cup of tea though, and especially if you end up feeling derailed emotionally most of the time.

Life is not meant to lived as a constant roller-coaster ride, at least in my opinion; it’s meant more to be about gentle rises and falls and ebbs and flows. The above suggestions can help in learning to master emotions in ways that are healthy and beneficial to you and those around you, so that there’s more freedom and enjoyment rather than drama at the expense of one’s sanity and well-being.

– Trilby


Trilby Johnson is an Emotional Breakthrough Mentor, Author and Speaker who helps her clients go from zero to hero, as they heal,  alleviate stress and cultivate freedom in their lives, relationships, finances, emotions, health and mindset. She shares her tried and tested know-how to create inner harmony and outer balance. 

If you desire to experience a deeper sense of connection with yourself and others and expand your consciousness, contact Trilby for a Breakthrough Assessment so that you too can go from zero to hero now!

©Trilby Johnson. All Rights Reserved. Copyright Prohibited. Please share any part of this article with reference to this original blog.

Disclaimer: Any information shared here is not a substitute or replacement of any medical, psychological, legal or financial advice.

4 Breakthrough Steps To Gratitude

4 Breakthrough Steps To Gratitude

There’s so much emphasis around ‘gratitude’ and how important it is if you want to be successful and fulfilled. So what happens when it seems a big ask to find something to be grateful for or about?

While being grateful is something we can all probably aspire to be more of, for many years I admit – I struggled to feel gratitude. It’s not that I didn’t want to be grateful – I did – however, keeping with my own integrity and honesty, I knew I wasn’t there yet! And quite frankly, faking it until I made it, wasn’t working for me either.

This often left me confused and feeling guilty – was there something wrong with me that I couldn’t feel gratitude for everything and all of the time? I was in a transformational pickle and for some time did not know which way to turn! Have you ever felt like this and wondered what’s going on or how to change it?

Quite simply, as the individual you are, the way in which you experience events and gratitude, is totally exclusive to you. So when presented with a new concept, it’s up to you to find the doorway in. Here are some of clues I followed that helped me to break through into gratitude, in a way that felt genuine and empowering.

1. Define Gratitude

Very often, due to indoctrination and socialization, you can get pulled into the definition of the ‘group consciousness’ around different concepts. Gratitude, is simply one example. So what does gratitude mean for you?

As humans, there is a tendency to want to classify information. For the most part, the linguistic or language meaning is used, as a form of creating easier understanding and cognitive cohesion. On the surface this works. However, this only addresses the mental aspects of definitions. There is another level of definition, commonly called semantics, or in other words, meaning. Take a look at what’s underneath the gratitude.

The way the brain stores data is very much linked to the emotional charge of the events in your life. When strong emotions are involved, then defining gratitude becomes a whole different kettle of fish. If you were to stop and imagine yourself being grateful, what would that look like, feel like, sound like to you? Follow these clues. I suggest one way of how, in point two.

2. Feel Your Way

Trust your feelings because they are your compass. If even feeling gratitude feels off, then all it is showing you, is that you haven’t yet found your way. Often there is a tendency to judge this as right or wrong, which can create a wedge between where you are and feeling gratitude. This is the reason that defining what gratitude embodies for you is essential, otherwise it simply will not stick and keeps you stuck.

If you feel that gratitude means giving up, faking it, lying to yourself, making another part of you feel wrong and it’s greedy to ask for more – then you will sabotage yourself in some way. It’s important to look at all the aspects that go into an attitude of gratitude – for you. And when along the way, it feels off for you, keep going and ask for clarity as you move forward. Feel your way – it’s your best bet!

3. Use Manners

Your words matter! They really do. Do you consciously say ‘please’ and ‘thank you’ when you want or receive something? This may appear an ‘old fashioned’ way of doing things, however, I am a firm believer in ‘old wisdom’.

The way you are speaking to others, is an outward reflection of how you speak to yourself – it shows what kind of a mind-map you have. Everything is within and this includes the capacity to gift and receive – and the code words to access these states are ‘please’ and ‘thank you’.

As a child, I was taught that if I wanted something, to ask and say ‘please’. And when I received something, to say ‘thank you’. Only much later as an adult did I observe, that when I consciously applied these to my intentions and desires, there was a distinct shift in the energy dynamic. Almost as if the Universe stopped and paid attention to what I was going to say and do.

Using manners helps to cultivate a ‘walk the talk’ behaviour! When I use my manners, I am acknowledging the divine aspect within myself and my capacity to co-create with Life itself. I am honouring my Self. This allows more ease and joy and a feeling of being ‘great-full’.

4. Make your Life a Gratitude Journal

A very powerful and practical way to create the possibility of breaking through into gratitude in my experience, is with a gratitude journal. I found it really helpful to focus on writing down things I was grateful for. It helped me to count my blessings and give them form. However, please don’t let keeping a journal be the end result. It’s the starting point! Apply this ‘gratitude’ in your daily life and interactions and communications with others.

In my personal experience, to fully integrate a mindset, takes conscious direction and frequent implementation. This is about applying mental and often abstract concepts with focus daily to create a ‘habit of gratitude’. This helped me to move through the struggle and meet gratitude in a pragmatic and tangible way that worked for me. And so can you!

Remember, gratitude is a process and as such, you simply cannot force your way into it. By connecting to the essence of what gratitude feels like for you, then you will have your unique form of gratitude. You do this by systematically assessing your feelings and observing what comes up for you.

Adjust. Align. Choose.

As you move forward with each step you are feeling your way and breaking through into gratitude.

Many Blissings

Trilby x


Trilby Johnson is an Emotional Breakthrough Mentor, Author and Speaker whose clients hire her to go from emotional zero to emotional hero, as they heal, alleviate stress and cultivate emotional freedom in their lives, relationships, finances, emotions, health and mindset. She shares her knowledge of how to create inner harmony and outer balance with those seeking to deepen their self-knowing and expand their consciousness.

Contact Trilby for a Breakthrough Alchemy Assessment if you are ready for go from zero to hero now!

©Trilby Johnson. All Rights Reserved. Copyright Prohibited. Please share any part of this article with reference to this original blog.

Disclaimer: Any information shared here is not a substitute or replacement of any medical, psychological, legal or financial advice.

5 Ways to Beat Loneliness

5 Ways to Beat Loneliness

Have you ever felt lonely?

Odds are that you have, at some point or other in your life. For some, this is a temporary and transient emotion that comes and goes. For others, feeling lonely can be a more permanent and unwanted visitor, that has far outstayed its welcome.

For instance, recent reports from Help Lines for those in need, show an increased number of calls, in particular during or around public holidays, from both people in relationships as well as those living alone.

Loneliness doesn’t discriminate!

Emotions are powerful players in our lives and depending on what and how they make us feel, are considered either friends or foes. Within our societies, cultures and gender roles, we become conditioned early on about what type of emotional behaviour is or isn’t acceptable. Yet, simultaneously, emotions are extremely personal and influenced by an individual’s inner relationship and sensibilities and personality types, such as introverts and extroverts.

Regardless of your personality type, however, it’s important and handy to know what to do and how to respond when loneliness begins to spread its fingers across our hearts and minds, to taint our lives in sad, dull and uncomfortable colours.

Loneliness has the power to disempower us so deeply in the most profound corners of our lives.

I know this because I used to feel constantly lonely, isolated and totally useless. So, I want to share five keys that helped me to beat loneliness, that can work for you too!

Here are 5 Ways to Beat Loneliness:

 

1. Admit How You are Feeling.

This may seem counterproductive at first because it can stir up fear. The fear of being consumed by feeling lonely. The fact of the matter, however, is that until you acknowledge what you feel, you are a slave to it. Many people feel ashamed or guilty to admit that they feel lonely, because of what it may imply. There is a fear that by admitting to something, it makes it true. This is a falsehood!

By admitting what it is you are feeling, you take back your power and can be objective about what’s really going on.

What you won’t own, enslaves you!

 

2. Give Your Loneliness A Form.

Strong emotions can often make us feel irrational. So, a great way to begin to ‘contain the situation’ in a safe environment and way, is by giving loneliness a form. For example, when you feel lonely, give it a scale of intensity from 1 -10. This is helpful, as it creates a space of detachment from the feeling, while still admitting it exists.

Each time you give a form to your loneliness helps you to see the intensity of your loneliness in a constructive way.

Remember that your emotions are real in your mind/brain and by giving them a form, as in a number, helps you to take a step back and be able to be detached in a healthy way.

 

3. Dig Deep.

The last thing you probably want to do when it comes to loneliness, is to dig deeper right? That’s fear – False Evidence Appearing Real – talking! And boy, it can feel scary feeling lonely. So, to beat this fear, dig deep and explore what is underneath the feeling of loneliness.

Make a list of all the feelings and thoughts that come to mind, no matter what they are. And practice makes progress, so do this often.

You can only change what you are willing to confront. Healing comes through feeling.

Which brings me to the next key point.

 

4. Don’t Shoot the Messenger.

Loneliness, like all emotions, brings a message with it. Humans, after all, are highly complex individuals. We are also creatures of habit and so it’s important to find out what is underneath our emotions. There is always a belief system that is attached to an emotional reaction. It’s part of our social, cultural and gender upbringing.

Ask yourself, “what is making me feel lonely?” and explore what comes up. This may sound challenging and requires a good dose of being honest with yourself in a gentle yet rigorous way.

The messenger is you, telling you more about yourself. Stop and listen and you will find that with more clarity the loneliness very often fades into the background and the true issue can be resolved, bringing peace of mind and calm.

 

5. Change Your Emotional Map.

Did you know that for the brain, all behaviours and emotions are mini programmes running the show? Otherwise called habits. The above keys are an outline on how to change your internal and emotional map. When you do this, your external map will begin to match up.

Allow yourself to stop and ask for directions on the way. You don’t have to beat loneliness on your own. I know from personal experience, that finding the help you need is key to beating loneliness.

Add pit stops of support to your emotional map as you progress and look for new destinations.

I hope you enjoy these 5 keys to beating loneliness. If you would like more tips on how to beat loneliness effectively, my book FEARLESSLY ALONE takes an in depth look at what makes us feel lonely and really afraid and how to break free and find your happy no matter what!

Many Blissings,

Trilby.


Trilby Johnson is a Breakthrough Healer and Mentor, Best Selling Author and Speaker. She offers her clients practical effective life skills and facilitates an energetic inner shift that empowers them to heal by alleviating anxiety, relieving psycho-emotional pain and reducing stress levels in their lives, relationships, finances, health, mindset and soul connection.

 Contact Trilby for a Breakthrough Assessment 

©Trilby Johnson. All Rights Reserved. Copyright Prohibited. Please share any part of this article with reference to this original blog.

Disclaimer: Any information shared here is not a substitute or replacement of any medical, psychological, legal or financial advice.

You Deserve a Winning Formula

You Deserve a Winning Formula

You Deserve a Winning Formula


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You deserve a winning formula!

When sculpting the life you desire,
find a formula that works for you
that is ever green.

One that has its own benchmark,
and you can gauge your progress
and advancement.

A formula with its own safety net,
to catch you when you fall.
Propulse you towards greater opportunities,
New solutions and experiences.

Stop peeling back the onion…
Onions only made me cry.
I much prefer expanding upwards spirals.
Spirals flow much better.
Feeling the continuum.
Infinite possibilities growing.

Figure out what you desire.
Learn how to ask for it.
Be willing to receive it and the form it takes.

Design by desire.
On your own terms.
Be your winning formula!

Much Love.
Trilby


Trilby Johnson is an Emotional Breakthrough Mentor, Author and Speaker whose clients hire her to go from emotional zero to emotional hero, as they heal, alleviate stress and cultivate emotional freedom in their lives, relationships, finances, emotions, health and mindset. She shares her knowledge of how to create inner harmony and outer balance with those seeking to deepen their self-knowing and expand their consciousness.

Contact Trilby for a Breakthrough Alchemy Assessment if you are ready for go from zero to hero now!

©Trilby Johnson. All Rights Reserved. Copyright Prohibited. Please share any part of this article with reference to this original blog.

Disclaimer: Any information shared here is not a substitute or replacement of any medical, psychological, legal or financial advice.

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